Walking my dog in woodland a few weeks ago, I suddenly became aware of a man following me.
Not liking the look of him, I began to walk faster. From several paces behind me he called out: ‘Is this the place to get sex?’
I kept walking, uncomfortably aware that there was no one else around.
‘You’ve got nice legs,’ he called after me. I ignored him and walked faster. He walked faster, too.
‘Come
on, love, give us a kiss.’ He sounded impatient. A brief glance behind
me showed a man in his 40s, short and balding with a pot belly.
Melissa Kite with her dog Cydney at the woods, where she walks everyday and regularly sees men using the woods for sex
With the car park in sight, I
started fumbling with my keys. He was still behind me, still asking if I
would kiss him — and more.
I clicked the wrong button as I tried to unlock the car door. ‘Oh come on, come on,’ I muttered desperately under my breath.
Pressing
the right button at last, I jumped in. As I drove off trembling, he was
still there, shouting at me, his arms out to the side as if to say
‘What’s your problem?’
I kept driving until I reached home, unnerved and shaken.
What was most shocking to me was I had not ventured out after dark, or along a city centre back street after pub closing time.
Tonight, Channel 4 will show a documentary called Dogging Tales, which looks at 'this peculiarly British pastime'
This happened in broad daylight
in picturesque Surrey woodland right next to the Royal Horticultural
Society gardens at Wisley.
Later, when I called the police they were polite, but seemingly unperturbed.
‘Why didn’t you ring from the scene?’ the officer asked.
‘Because I had to get away.’
‘Well,’ the officer said, ‘there’s not much we can do now.’
I explained, rather crossly, that this was not the first time this had happened.
In
fact, I come across men seeking partners for sex in these woods more
and more often. It used to be a well-known spot among men cruising for
gay sex, but increasingly the woods are also being used by straight men
looking for encounters with women.
'I
began to walk faster. From several paces behind me he called out: ‘Is
this the place to get sex?’ I kept walking, uncomfortably aware that
there was no one else around'
Surely, I asked the officer, the
police should send a patrol just in case this particular man found
another female dog-walker to hassle — or worse?
He replied that he would log my call and send an officer if they had one spare.
But
as I put the phone down, I had little expectation of my complaint being
investigated. This is because the leafy and peaceful area of Ockham and
Wisley commons is now officially designated by the police as a ‘Public
Sex Environment’, or PSE.
At
night, the car park is filled with cars flashing their lights as dozens
congregate, apparently unimpeded by police. Among the gay men who visit
the woods during the day, many wear wedding rings. They sit in their
cars, pretending they are reading a book, then follow another man into
the woods.
I once saw a man emerge with another
man from behind a tree, then start walking back to the car park on his
phone saying: ‘Yes darling, I’m on my way. Oh great, I love lamb chops.’
The
police insist that PSE is simply a convenient shorthand and that it
does not mean the activity is facilitated by the authorities.
I disagree.
They
may not have intended it, but the term PSE has come to be seen by
people who frequent such outdoor spaces as a badge of distinction.
In internet chatrooms, PSE is
generally accepted, rightly or wrongly, to describe an area where
open-air sex is lightly policed.
People
now pull off the nearby A3 for sex in these woods, which sit in a
glorious corner of Surrey between the attractive and well-heeled
commuter districts of Esher and Guildford. And they seem to have little
fear of being caught because the police patrols are surprisingly
infrequent.
To
understand why this should be, you need to realise that there is nothing
in the law that explicitly prohibits having sex outdoors, unless it can
be proved that you are causing ‘alarm, harassment or distress’ to
someone.
Perhaps we
should not be surprised that in our increasingly inclusive,
anything-goes society, there is very little censorship of open-air sex
acts. The Sexual Offences Act 2003 outlaws flashing and sex in public
toilets — but sex behind a tree is not illegal, per se.
What’s
more, in 2008, an internal police report advised officers to avoid a
‘knee-jerk reaction’ to those found having sex in public spaces.
This
politically correct attitude seems to have resulted in officers being
reluctant to confront ‘doggers’ — the unpleasant term used to describe
those who meet in public spaces and car parks to have, and watch others
have, sex, because open-air sex has been deemed simply another sexual
preference.
Perhaps the police fear that if these
people are confronted they will go to the European Court of Human
Rights to uphold their right to sexual fulfilment.
There
is certainly, according to those officers I have talked to, a concern
that gay cruisers should not be confronted too robustly for fear the
police will be deemed homophobic.
Indeed,
when I called Surrey Police to ask them to explain their policy about
sex in outdoor spaces, I was told that I would need to speak to their
‘diversity officer’ and also to LAGLO.
‘What
is that?’ I asked. ‘It’s our Lesbian and Gay Liaison Officer,’ he said.
In fact, the person who called me back with a response to my queries
was a Press officer at Surrey Police headquarters, but his response will
fill any right-minded person with utter despair.
‘Surrey
Police works closely with local residents and users of the public sex
environment (PSE) site at Wisley. Officers carry out regular patrols and
if any criminal incidents arise then proportionate action will be
taken.
‘However,
it is not against the law for people to be present at a PSE site with
the purpose of meeting others to engage in conversation or activity that
doesn’t contravene existing legislation.’
If you think this is straying into the absurd, it seems it is difficult to get anyone to take this subject seriously.
Tonight, Channel 4 will show a
documentary called Dogging Tales, which looks at ‘this peculiarly
British pastime’. They make it sound like a game of cricket or a visit
to a stately home.
The
film is shot in atmospheric soft-focus, but the men are manipulative,
the women nervous and the overall impression is sad and sordid.
This
is not a victimless pastime. Beauty spots are becoming no-go areas. At
the stables where I keep my horses, there are mothers who will no longer
let their daughters hack out into the countryside on their ponies
because teenage girls have been flashed.
Many people I know do not take their children for walks on the common for fear of what they may inadvertently stumble across.
I
nearly stopped walking there myself after coming across three men
engaged in a sex act I had never even heard of before I actually saw it.
I felt troubled that my dog had witnessed it, never mind a child.
Those who regularly walk in the woods also complain of the litter which accompanies such acts.
I’ve seen debris including condoms, pages of pornographic magazines, even underpants. Stephen
Bungay, who owns the Ockham Bites café on the common, says that every
morning before opening up he collects a bin-bag full of debris from
outside his kiosk including sex toys and latex gloves.
‘I
haven’t got a problem with what anyone does in their own home, but this
is a lovely family place and I want families here,’ he says. ‘I have
four children and if they saw something like this it would scar them
for life.’
The
rangers from Surrey Wildlife pursue dog-walkers who fail to pick up
dog-mess, but I have never seen them ask a cruiser to pick up their
condoms.
Hazel Longworth, a Surrey resident, has been campaigning on the issue for years.
She
says: ‘I’ve got a four-year-old grandson and I’m worried he will see
people having sex, or pick up a used condom. It’s all very well saying
people have the right to have sex in the woods, but what about our
rights?’
If
people are foregoing the pleasure of walking, horse-riding and going
for picnics with their children in their local countryside then surely
that does make them the victims of a crime.
It should not fall to us to prove to the police that we were ‘alarmed, harassed or distressed’.
If
local forces patrolled known sites regularly, they would catch men and
women indecently exposing themselves, and could impose on-the-spot
fines. They are quick enough to fine any motorist caught parked on a
double yellow line.
But it seems they just may not want to police this particular crime.
Two years ago, a Freedom of Information request to Surrey Police elicited an astonishing response.
The
request asked if the county force had given out food and drink at
public sex sites as part of their strategy of policing these sites. The
reply was ‘yes’, it had ‘provided teas and coffees to all members of
society using the area for various reasons’.
The
force were also asked how many public sex or cruising sites they were
aware of in Surrey. The answer came back with estimates of 19 in
Guildford, six in Waverley, nine in Woking, eight in both Elmbridge and
Mole Valley — 50 in all.
Meanwhile,
tonight’s Channel 4 documentary about ‘this intriguing and unusual’
pastime will doubtless appeal to viewers who pride themselves on being
non-judgmental.
In
doing so, the film-maker no doubt wants to tackle the prejudices of
people like me who want to enjoy the countryside without being hassled
for sex. How very small-minded of me.
dailymail.co.uk
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