Wednesday, January 15, 2014

'First you stare at each other, then you go in bed and do sex': The 24 steps to falling in love. . . according to two second grade girls

Falling in love is a topic explored by countless poets, singers and writers, and now two second grade girls have provided their own insight into the phenomenon.
Writer Ted Scheinman, from Chapel Hill, North Carolina, tweeted a picture of the handwritten how-to guide composed by two students at the Boston school where his sister teaches.
The 24-step process as interpreted by the girls includes 'stare at the person', 'go dance and put your noses together' and 'go in bed and do sex'.
Enlarge   Imparting knowledge: The girls apparently penned the informative list on a napkin during 12 minutes of free time that they had after they finished an assignment early
Imparting knowledge: The girls apparently penned the informative list on a napkin during 12 minutes of free time that they had after they finished an assignment early

According to Mr Scheinman's interview with The Awl, the girls penned the informative list on a napkin during 12 minutes of free time that they had after they finished an assignment early.
The steps go up to 24, with steps seven, nine and 14 through 24 left blank for some unknown reason.
Among the steps that are filled in, a surprising number are centered around 'doing sex', perhaps an indication that they watch a little too much TV.
'Barring the (ahem) abrupt transition between steps three and four, certain moments strike me as rather romantic'
Step four, for example, reads: 'You go in bed and do sex,' and step six says: 'Get nacked in bed and do more sex [sic].'
And the youngsters seem to have a skewed view of the order in which events occur when it comes to falling in love.
Indeed, they list 'doing sex' as the fourth step, while 'dance and put your noses together' comes a full four steps later.
Enlarge   Imparting knowledge: The girls apparently penned the informative list on a napkin during 12 minutes of free time that they had after they finished an assignment early
Imparting knowledge: The girls apparently penned the informative list on a napkin during 12 minutes of free time that they had after they finished an assignment early

Enlarge   Imparting knowledge: The girls apparently penned the informative list on a napkin during 12 minutes of free time that they had after they finished an assignment early
Imparting knowledge: The girls apparently penned the informative list on a napkin during 12 minutes of free time that they had after they finished an assignment early

And apparently, a couple can only 'go to the pool together' after they 'give each other rings'.
Mr Scheinman's sister said the girls are 'really good friends, though I wouldn’t say they're best friends.'
Funny find: Writer Ted Scheinman (pictured) tweeted a photo of the guide, which was written by students at the school where his sister teaches
Funny find: Writer Ted Scheinman (pictured) tweeted a photo of the guide, which was written by students at the school where his sister teaches

She added: 'They play together often during recess - lots of cartwheels and flips and gymnastics in general - and are very popular. . . or as popular as one can be in second grade.'
What's more, they apparently come from families where English is a first language, but not the only one, which 'may demystify various missing prepositions (e.g. step four),' explains Mr Scheinman.
The cover of the guide, which was stapled together to make it look like a book, reads simply: 'How to fall in love'.
In Mr Scheinman's humorous analysis of the text, he came to the conclusion that the second-graders may be imparting some valuable knowledge on their readers.
'Barring the (ahem) abrupt transition between steps three and four, certain moments in the text strike me as old-fashioned and rather romantic,' he told The Awl.
'Consider the dancing of the noses, and the repeated use of the adverb "forever." True love remains a real, if giggle-inducing, idea for these girls. There may yet be hope for monogamy?'

dailymail.co.uk

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