It’s always
better to start from the beginning.
But for now
Anurika, let me just summarise my problem.
I want to
leave my husband. I don’t think I can take it anymore.
I know a lot
of marriages have their problems. Some couples troubles are greater than
others…others less than others.
In the big
picture, I don’t know which category mine belongs. Suffice to say, I don’t
think I can take it anymore. My body had taken much beating, but I don’t think
my heart can take anymore humiliations.
You may call
me Yemisi. I’m in my early thirties.
I was dating
a guy called Wale, when he suddenly won a Visa Lottery and travelled overseas. After
waiting for Wale for several years, my mother began to disturb me to get
married, settle down and have children.
I ‘m not
educated but have a business of my own as a trader. I didn’t even know anything
about internet communication. Yes, I had phone, but Wale never called. It was
almost as if he had disappeared from the face of the earth. Then I met my
husband Waheed.
I felt that
I have gotten a replacement for Wale in my heart and life. I fell in love again.
But right
now, it seems like I married the wrong man! Is there anything like marrying the
wrong man?
I met Waheed
at a friend’s naming ceremony, we exchanged contact and the rest as they say, ‘is
story’.
We had two
lovely kids both boys. Waheed never bothered for their up keeping or how they
paid their tuition fee.
I always ran
to my mum for financial assistant and she never hesitated in reminding me
how she had kicked against the relationship.
But today, I
can’t even meet her, to explain and reveal the hell my marriage had become.
Waheed
always makes sure we shared everything, down to the rent and NEPA bill.
I had never
enjoyed the relationships that existed between couples.
Some years
later, Wale was in town looking for me. He was quite upset when he saw me. He said
I was looking haggard and unkempt.
He was so furious that he requested to speak
with my husband. After that meeting with Wale, he started helping me out with
money for the kids.
No!
I had never gone to him for money; neither had he ever came looking to give me
money.
He only
gives me money whenever we bumped into each on the road. We both were born and
grew up on Lagos Island.
I started
avoiding him after he asked that we should continue our love affair despite the
fact that we were both married.
I almost to
succumb to his idea because of what Waheed had been putting me through, but I couldn’t!
I respect the sanctity of marriage and had never cheated on my husband since we
married.
But the
situation in our marriage continues to deteriorate.
I know that
my husband was into extra marital affairs, but time, the situation is bad.
These days
when we lay together on the bed, Waheed not touch me.
He had not
made love with in the past eight months. He treats me like a leper.
The present
lady he is having extra marital affair with, lives about two streets away from
our house.
He had now started bringing her to our matrimonial
home. And would to send to go and buy drinks for both of them.
Whenever I
refused, he would beat me. Waheed used to give me and the children N300 as allowance
for the day but always goes to the restaurant to eat with his mistress. He
expects me to cook with the N300, including to buy assorted meats, which are
his favourite. He also expects me to buy the children school snacks from the
money.
Where does
he expect me to get money for all these things?
My siblings suggested I moved out of his
house.
These days
he would just stare at me and asked no one in particular: “Why did I marry this
ugly lady?”
I know I’m
not ugly. If what people say is anything to go by, then I’m quite beautiful.
These days I
used to ask myself what I’m still doing with him.
The last
straw that broke the camel’s back was his latest bedroom activity.
It appeared
he preferred to masturbate, rather than touch me. The first time, I wept. But now,
I’m dead inside out!
He had
removed my picture and those of our kids from his phone screen, replacing it
with that of his mistress. Most times, he would prefer to lie on the floor,
than on the bed with me.
Please just
give me five reasons why I should not walk away from this sham of a marriage?
(The story was re-written for better
understanding by readers and contributors)
No comments:
Post a Comment