As a young girl the 48-year old from south London, who has chosen to remain anonymous, was subjected to sex with paedophiles, with her mother receiving money or alcohol in return.
Even after she was taken into care the abuse continued during weekend visits home and only stopped when Claire* ran away for good at the age of 15.
Speaking out: A woman (left) who was sold for sex by her own mother (right) has revealed how she suffered a decade of rape from the age of five
It was only after her mother died that Claire felt brave enough to contact police and report what had happened.
However, because her mother was dead no action could be taken and instead Claire decided to talk about her shocking experiences to help other abuse victims find a voice.
Hidden torment: 'Claire' (right), pictured with her mother as a teenager, remained silent about her abuse for years
'That might sound awful but words cannot describe the hatred and fear I had for that woman after what she forced me to do.
‘I remained frightened of her my whole life. I regret not reporting her while she was still alive because there can be no greater act of evil for a mother than to sell the body of her own daughter.
‘But it was only when she died that I felt free. The police couldn’t do anything of course but it felt like a weight had gone just to report it.
‘People think things like this don’t happen on our streets but I’m living proof and I want to use my story to save other children from a life like mine.’
Claire was just five years old when she remembers her mother taking her to a man for the first time.
She had no idea of what was about to happen when her cruel mother ordered her to get dressed that day.
'I remember mum taking me to a block of flats and her knocking the door,' she said.
'She spoke to the man and then pushed me inside the door.
‘I was so young I just did what I was told. I knew it felt wrong but I was scared and confused and after he gave me a lollipop.’
After their encounter, the man sent Claire back outside to her mother on the street and she started to cry.
‘I remember mum telling me to stop sniveling. There was no comfort or emotion from her at all.’
Stolen innocence: Claire as a baby with her mother. Just a few years later the older woman would arrange for her daughter to be raped in return for money or alcohol
Relief: Claire found out in 2011 that her mother had died, and says she felt 'a huge sense of relief that she had gone'
Her mother would allow them to take Claire and Pauline to a disused factory behind their house where they would be raped in exchange for payment.
Claire said: 'Mum would just sneer at me after. I had no idea why she hated me so much. She barely fed us and made us sleep on the floor. I lived in fear of knocks at the door.'
Cruel: Claire was just five years old when she remembers her mother (pictured) taking her to a man for the first time
Appallingly, while she was there she suffered even more abuse, but weekend visits home were even more terrifying.
On one occasion while she was being raped her mother remained in the room with her, and even told her daughter to be quiet when she screamed.
It was only a matter of time before one of the sisters fell pregnant, with Pauline learning that she was expecting a baby at just 14.
Desperation: Claire aged 15, just before she ran away from home in an attempt to escape her torment
'Despite that my sister wanted to keep the baby but mum forced her to give the child up for adoption.'
Claire says she was so afraid that the same would eventually happen to her that when she was 15 she made the decision to run away, spending the first two weeks away from home sleeping rough in a public toilet.
'It was awful but no where near as bad as what I had left behind,' she said.
Eventually she was offered a place to stay by a taxi driver she befriended. The couple soon fell in love and married when Claire was 19.
They went on to have six children together and Claire did her best to push the horrors of her childhood to the back of her mind and focus on being a good mother.
'My children were my world, my everything,' she explained.
'Having them made it harder to understand how mum could have treated us the way she did.'
Claire refused to have anything to do with her mother, and came to suspect that her father was likely a punter who paid her mother for sex.
She said: 'I had nobody at all. Not having any parent was something I had to come to terms with. But my children gave me all the love I needed and I managed to move forward.'
However, soon after she turned 40, Claire’s world was turned upside down when she was introduced to the niece her sister had been forced to give up all those years ago.
She explained she had tracked down her biological father who had admitted paying her birth mother’s mother for sex with her daughter.
Parent: Claire, pictured with one of her own children, suspects that her father was likely to have been a punter who paid her mother for sex
Shock: When she was 40, Claire, pictured with one of her own children, was introduced to the niece her sister had been forced to give up all those years ago
The sickening revelation brought the memories she had buried to the surface and shortly after Claire suffered a breakdown.
She was admitted to hospital and spent months recovering.
Claire said: ‘The baby my sister had been forced to give up had been adopted by a wonderful loving family and that was the only good thing to come out of it all.
Motherhood: Claire and her husband went on to have six children together and Claire did her best to push the horrors of her childhood to the back of her mind and focus on being a good mother
Moving forward: Claire with her own daughter. She describes her children as the ;love and light of her life'
‘I couldn’t cope with any reminders of my past and neither could my sister.’
As she recovered, Claire moved home from hospital but her marriage crumbled under the strain.
Years had passed when she heard her estranged mother was gravely ill with heart problems.
She said: 'My brothers had remained in contact with her and urged me to visit her before she died and because I needed answers I agreed to see her.
'She was old and frail but I was still terrified of her.'
Exploited: Now a mother herself, Claire says she can not forgive her own mother for what she did
'I knew I wasn’t going to get what I needed so I just walked out and that was the last time I ever saw her,' said Claire.
Months later in 2011 she heard her mother had died. 'I started to laugh because I felt a huge sense of relief that she was gone.'
It was then she decided to go to police.
'I didn’t know if they could help me trace the men that had raped me but they said without mum it was impossible,' she said.
'They were very kind and sympathetic and I wished I had gone to them while she was still alive.
She did attend her mother’s funeral, but not to mourn.
'I just needed to make sure she was really gone,' she explains.
'There is no way I could forgive her for what she did. She exploited me in the sickest way possible and I now realise she was not my mother. She was an abuser.
'My children are the love and light of my life and I can say with 100 per cent certainty I am nothing like her.
'But she should have paid the price for her crimes. I’m just sorry I didn’t find the strength to report her while she was still alive.'
Claire now hopes to find peace by writing a book about her ordeal, which she hopes will help other victims find the courage to speak out.
'I regretted not acting sooner and in time I decided to start writing about what I had been through. I hope reading my story will help other victims make their voice heard.
'What she put us through was unspeakable. But it happened right here in out country and it saddens me to say it is probably happening to another child now.
'Victims need justice and I want my story to help other victims find that courage to go to the police. I wish I had.'
*All names have been changed.
DAILYMAIL.CO.UK
1 comment:
I'm horrified @ this story! Such a diseased mind!! I hope she rots in hell. Beast of a mother. I'm relived that the daughter is doing Much better and even had a family of her own. Lord have mercy on us all.
Meanwhile I'm a great fan of yours, we followed your colum in your days with Sun Newspaper, infact our Sunday isn't complete untill and unless mom goes out to buy the paper!! But just like that, you quit! Well I'm happy to have reconnected with Ɣ☺ΰ somehow shaa vis ur blog and face book. And thank God you are now happily married with kids too!! I truly enjoy your 'horrible' sense of homour!! Aaaaaah!!!! How I loved ur article then!! Well take of your self. I'm ify Onyido on FB. Have a great day.
Post a Comment