My dear Jimeta,
As I read through your mail, I feel the sadness
heavy like a lead upon you.
You want my opinion, but my opinion is not the
ultimate. The ultimate solution lies between you and your wife.
The only thing I can say is this; the foundation for
a good marriage is truth. Truth is a sister to trust.
Partners should be able to open up to each other.
Marriage is a life-time commitment. It’s not a girlfriend-boyfriend relationship
where you get to walk out when the heat is too hot in the kitchen.
If a guy wants to marry a lesbian or a lady wants to
marry a gay guy, they should be given that option. Tell the person the truth
about you and give him/her the chance to decide if he/she still wants you in
his life.
Knowing what you’re and still walking down the aisle
with the naïve partner, is a form of a deceit to me. You are leading him/her
down a blind alley.
But hey, we’re in a country, where everybody frowns
and is ready to hurl stones at people they perceive as being different. We fear
what we don’t understand. We don’t understand these different men and women and
their sexual proclivities.
In Nigeria, lesbians and homosexuals are seen as
being different. Nobody wants to understand them. Nobody wants to frolic with
them. Very few people are their friends and many wants to stone them to death,
already assigning them to a portion of land in the lake of fire.
With this mindset, how many women do you think would
come out of the closet to say she’s a lesbian, especially to a-would-be-husband?
I used to be
scathing about such men and women, but I learned. Now, I try to understand
them. And that’s why I have issues with people who describe them as “being
possessed by evil spirit.”
Yes, my Nigerian brothers and sisters always bring
everything down to spirituality. But I know that some scientist think there may
be a gene responsible for it.
In Nigerian society, a lady is expected to get
married at a certain age and begins to procreate.
Whether a lady is lesbian or not, she is expected to
get married. She is expected to have babies…
Whether they make good wives if what I don’t know.
I’d never been a lesbian. For reasons I don’t know,
I seem to be fascinated by the two-lines-men and one-referee dangling between
the thighs of a guy.
I also enjoy
those dangling things between a guy’s thighs plunging into my warm crevices.
I’ve been never been particularly interested in
female contours and can’t ever remember wondering what the female nipples taste
like. I can’t remember ever getting wet by looking at the nakedness of a fellow
female.
During my undergraduate days; we were three ladies
that lived in the same room. If there was an opportunity to know if my genes
were geared towards lesbianism, that would have been the time.
We used to sit naked and eat. We sit naked on bed
and discuss about our boy-friends. We sleep naked because Ilorin weather is humid.
In fact, we used to shave each other!
Yep! Shock, aren’t you? Well there it is!
But at no time did I feel compel to touch or kiss my
friends.
But I also know that in my campus-Mini Campus-, a
lady attempted to rape another lady. For those of you following my column since
The Sun days, I’d already told you the story of Irene and Latin.
If you want me to tell you the story all over again,
please let me know.
My friend in the office, Juliet Bomah, did a story
on house wives and lesbianism. She went undercover, pretending to be a
desperate, sexually hungry housewife, searching for women-lovers. She
discovered several. It was shocking she said.
I however want to believe that some women may become
lesbians after marriage. While some may marry, hoping to be a good wife, but
something, maybe a twist of fate may occur, leading to them embracing
lesbianism.
Perhaps we need to ask ourselves, why a housewife
would prefer to fall in love with another female and start a torrid affair with
her. Yes, I said love and I didn’t use that word loosely. The emotion-love
between lesbians is so thick, that you can hardly slice through with a knife. Why
would she mortgage her marriage?
Keep a date with us next week
08189679439…ebere20@gmail.com
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