‘Padlocking’ a guy’s manhood (2)

I mean being innovative. I know there are women who balk at anything different from missionary style.

 Phew! They can’t even give their husbands blow job or allow their husbands to suckle their honey well.

It will also be good for a wife to give to her husband as good as she gets. What do I mean you ask?

Meet him thrust for thrust. Don’t just lay there like a log of wood. This is your husband. He’s not a badly dressed Indian movie actor, sweating and panting over you.

For pity sake, show a little bit of interest in the game both of you are playing on the bed! The gusto with which you welcome your husband into bed for lovemaking is an aphrodisiac, especially anytime his mind replays the sexual scene.
But what really got Oji sitting up was when I told him about mistresses using black magic on their lovers to ‘padlock’ his manhood.

 Yes O!
Whether you believe it or not, it’s not going to change the fact that it’s happening every day.
Even housewives have been known to use it on their husbands.


A woman is a woman, whether she’s a mistress or a housewife. The most difficult property to share among women is a manhood.


No matter how much a lady loves her friend or sister, it’s always a tough decision to share her man’s sugar stick.
Thus, a mistress will start a love affair with a guy, knowing full well that he’s married. But after a while into the relationship, she might want him for keeps.


That’s where the problem starts. Some mistresses are more possessive than the legal wives.
They are so possessive that they no longer want the guy to be able to service his legal wife at home. They now see the sugar stick as theirs!


They seek desperate measures to secure his sugar bar for only themselves.
When it’s time for the guy to bang the mistress, you’d see him roaring like a lion…his JT will become erect like an angry god, with all the sinews standing on end…it’ll practically breathe fire and brimstones so to say.


But when it’s time to bang his legal wife, the same JT will become as flabby as an eko (pap).
 No matter how hard he tries, it will stubbornly remains flaccid, lying down among those hairs like a bored soldier who was heartily sick of fighting wars and you know what sort of wars I mean.


It could wag its head tiredly, but that’s it…it won’t and can’t possibly do justice to any babe’s honey pot. I mean, if it can’t stand, how on earth is it supposed to penetrate the woman?


It happened to my friend Omokuje. I have told you guys this story before.
My friend is a born womaniser. He fell in lust with a certain lady. The lady’s father is an herbalist. He got her pregnant and reluctantly married her to keep her family off his back.
Naturally, he didn’t stop his philandering. It was so bad that the lady caught him repeated times in the clutches of another woman. It was also so bad, that she got to know the ladies Omokuje was banging on their street.
Oh the shame…the wagging tongues anytime she walked pass…the sniggers…


One day, Omokuje was about to plunder another conquest, but he was shell shocked when his manhood refused to heed his call to ‘attention.’
He tried all he could, including urging the lady to take him into his mouth, but the snake just would not hiss, let alone to slither!
It was the height of embarrassment for him.
For men who belonged to his category, whose rating in bed is all the ego boosting they needed, it was the height of disgrace.
He left the room with his tail between his legs: he looked crushed and humiliated.


When he got home, his wife wanted to play. He couldn’t tell her that something was wrong with his manhood. But he didn’t need to anyway. Before he could say Jack Robison, his one eyed snake, which had been on vacation on that same day, suddenly hissed to life.


He went for another conquest, thinking it was a momentary lapse, but alas it happened again. When he got home, the thing got up again. It was almost as if his wife was a snake charmer, holding the remote control to the snake in her husband’s pants.


Without discussing with his wife, Omokuje went to all his friends, telling them to come and beg his wife to release his manhood to become normal. It was that important to him. The normalcy I mean.


When they reached the presence of the lady, nobody bothered with an explanation, they all fell down flat on their stomachs, begging the shocked lady.


It was actually Omokuje who later narrated this story to me. He told me that before his manhood went back to normal, they had to go and beg the lady’s father.
I pity those who keep saying ‘juju no dey.’
To be continued